Waiting on the Lord
During my time in Angola I have been struggling to find my purpose, my 'reason' for being here. The days seem to come and go and I am left thinking, "What have I done?"
While in Mozambique I felt used by the Lord on a near daily basis, for sure on a weekly basis, so why oh why would the Lord take away? Just when i feel like an opportunity is presenting itself, I feel like it is snatched from under me.
Last week I found myself sitting in my little mud house with the doors shut and the windows closed in tears. I turned on my Beth Moore video, which I should have watched about a week ago, and tried to focus.
Do you know what it was about?
Waiting on the Lord.
What timing! How the Lord knew what I needed! He is good like that. =)
She talked of the scriptures in Isaiah 40 verses 28-31 that say,
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
Doesn't this seem contrary to real life? In real life, when we are waiting for something, it is draining! It takes forever. We lose strength. But the key is that we must not wait for things, for dates, or for opportunities, we must was for the Lord.
Before Jesus died, he told the disciples that they were to go to Jerusalem and wait for the Holy Spirit. The disciples waited in the upper room until the day of Pentecost.
(Can't you imagine that the whole they were waiting they would look to each other and say, "Did you hear that? Was the the Holy Spirit? Has he come? Did you feel that? They had no idea what it would be like!)
In some ways I feel like this time for me is a time of waiting, a time of waiting for the filling of the Holy Spirit. I find myself sitting in this little mud house, waiting.
At the end of the lesson she talked about balancing passion with patience. If you know me, you know I have that passion part covered. I am ready! But sometimes the Lord asks us to be patient. Sometimes He is going before us, preparing the way. Sometimes He is working right inside of us, preparing us for the work ahead.
No matter what the cause, when we wait upon the Lord, when we wait on Him, we will be strengthened. I don't need to focus on being "used" or "doing", I just need Him and His power at work within me.
April 5, 2010 at 2:00 PM
Amen! Oh how this is such a hard one! Waiting! Hey I think all of life is filled with what is my purpose? We gotta be still and let the Lord move...I like that you said he maybe preparing something ahead and maybe just working on us....So true! I love you and miss you tons!
April 5, 2010 at 6:08 PM
And sometimes "the work ahead" is to get even more in love with Him, to learn even more about sitting at His feet and drinking from His cup of love. Ahhh the waiting! How precious it is!!! He becomes our assignment and undivided focus! Layne, love your posts and praying for you. Vesna Babanovski
April 5, 2010 at 9:02 PM
Isaiah 40 was my go-to Bible passage during the year Keith was unemployed. It was such a time of waiting, and sadness, and wondering what we were supposed to do, when God would provide a job, where that job would be, etc. It didn't hit me until well into that year that the waiting was the doing. The waiting was was the thing that was building the virtue of patience, just as you said. The waiting was also the way I could worship God in submission and show him that I recognize that he is God, he has a plan for us, and he was good, and his timing was best.
I pray the Holy Spirit fill you deeply and richly right now. I pray that he grow you into a woman overflowing with patience and give you supreme joy in the waiting on his timing and purposes.
April 8, 2010 at 3:07 AM
i totally hear the balancing passion and patience, and how lovely that he put off you watching that video
April 9, 2010 at 5:23 AM
What a sweet reminder of that study! And here I am thinking I needed to hear that now as well:) Thanks for your words and I can SOOOO relate. I know He is never wasting time, always at work and I pray these will be such sweet memories to your walk one day:)